It can be very traumatic to receive an unsolicited dick pic. I know I have received a number of them when online dating. Even when I asked them not to send me a dick pic, some men have said they had not offered to send me one and then three messages later sent me one. The anger that rose in me is next level. I wish I had then ‘6 steps to dealing with the trauma of receiving an unrequested dick pic’. I haven’t seen anybody else’s penis for the last 13 years and 6 months as I was married. I hadn’t even been watching porn over the last 14 years. So it was especially jarring for me to receive these dick pics.
I sat with myself and my counsellor to unpack why I was so upset. It triggered in me an experience I had when I was 11 years old. I went for dinner with my aunt and uncle and upon leaving the restaurant that night I walked past a man in a big black jacket who flashed his penis at me. I got such a fright I froze and never told my aunt and uncle. That night I slept over at their home. I lay awake most of the night terrified that the flasher would find out where I stayed. The frightened young girl in me got triggered by the online dick pics as I had not yet dealt with that trauma. It was hidden so deep inside of me. In today’s world if someone had to flash his penis at me I could go to the police and he would be locked up in jail. Somehow men on social media can get away with it.
I've been using these 6 ways to deal with the trauma of receiving an unsolicited dick pic
1. Block him
Usually, men won’t send a dick pic in the online app – possibly there is AI that picks things like that up.
They usually send them via WhatsApp.
2. Write his name on a piece of loo paper and flush it
This is a very strange recommendation I know. But don’t knock it till you try it. I often do it with anyone that annoys me. Because after I have done it and my mind wants to rehash the situation in my head, I remember it is dealt with and let it go.
3. Know you did nothing wrong to invite this behaviour – don’t take it personally
When I first received a dick pic I blamed myself. In my head, I thought there must be something in me that attracted this kind of behaviour. I looked at my trauma and was free from that now. I know that someone else’s unsavoury behaviour is not my fault or responsibility. I have used it to heal and not get the better of me. I am so thrilled I get to share my experience, strength, and hope with you too.
4. Go shower or bath or swim and wash the yukky feelings off you
I love taking a salt bath or showering and just letting all the yukky feelings flow down and out of me and feel the love of Grace pour over my head and refresh, renew, replenish my soul and feel free.
5. Watch this hysterical video by Desiree Burch on BBC Comedy
https://fb.watch/c3dZaSyJBM/
6. Contact me if you still feel triggered, hurt, angry, uncomfortable
Should you like to look at some of the triggers you might be experiencing whilst dating or single please feel free to connect with me for a no-obligation 20-minute zoom call to discuss your needs and how I can assist your healing and becoming the very best version of yourself and thus in the best position to attract your next true love.
I hope these 6 ways I have been using to deal with the trauma of receiving an unsolicited dick pic have been useful to you.
Contact me when you are ready to fall in love with yourself and find your next true love.
